Editorial: Elect Jason Eugene Terry to the 2013 N.B.A. Eastern Conference All-Star Team

...Not just yet.

This morning's edition of the venerable "Morning Dump" over at Red's Army summarily dismissed the sensational trade rumors swirling around our beloved Boston Celtics last night as -- in just so many words -- "total bullshit."

This news was more than welcome.  Especially to yours truly.

Still, even as we bask in the glow of a thrilling 102-96 win over the New York Knickerbockers at Madison Square Garden, MercerJersey.com can't shake the particularly icky feeling that the inclusion of one particular name in that rumor generated.

That name?  Jason Eugene Terry.

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Most Celtics fans would agree that trading Paul Pierce or KG would amount to sacrilege.  For many, the oft-recurring prospect of trading Rajon Rondo would only fall just short of that designation.  Not nearly enough, however, were properly outraged by the idea of sending JET packing.

While there are a variety of factors we could debate as to why trading Mr. Terry could be unwise, there is one indisputable reason why it would be offensive.

Negating said reason would require the use of lasers.

Jason Terry: the personification of "all in."

Will Hunting was off by one; there are actually three certainties in life.

1.  Don't do that.

2.  You dropped a hundred and fifty grand on a fuckin' education you coulda gotten for a dollah fifty in late chahges at the public library.

3.   When you sign a free agent to a three-year contract and he immediately proceeds to TATTOO YOUR TEAM'S LOGO ONTO HIS LEFT BICEP... You don't turn around and trade him midway through year no. 1.  Not cool.

How should Celtics fans process the lingering possibility that Danny Ainge might cross this last, sacred line?  What can we do to show our support for a man who, before ever actually donning the Green & White, professed his willingness to commit homicide in its name?

Let 'em know, KG.

Look into those eyes and try not following KG's instructions.
(However photoshopped they may be.)

In the shadow of these troubling rumors, to show him the respect and appreciation he so deserves, and regardless of the merit of his performance on the court, MercerJersey.com enthusiastically endorses Jason Eugene Terry for the 2013 N.B.A. Eastern Conference All-Star Team.

With just a week left before polls close, can we make Mr. Terry a starter?  Probably not.  Can he can surpass Jesus Shuttlesworth in total votes?  Unlikely -- though that would be another enjoyable slap in Ray's face.

But we could totally push him past Mr. Jrue Holiday.

...

Friends.  Romans.  Celtics fans.

With apologies to Jason and his Reebok allegiances, let's make like Nike and just do it.

DOWN WITH JRUE HOLIDAY!!

Spread the word: #VOTE4JET.

...Or die.
(JK.)